I know. I've been gone forEVER. I really appreciate the notes from you guys saying 'where are you? blog, bitch! I'm bored! why don't you write! blah blah blah!' and I even appreciate you, GinGR, who emailed me to say "Whyyyyyyy don't U rite? U 2 bzzy wit yr boyf? u kin b bzzy wit MEEEEE LOLOLOLOL" Yes. Yes I can b bzzy wit u. I am just choosing not to. But that doesn't mean I don't luv u, u no wot i meen? LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL.
So, school. This summer I did one year (two semesters) of physics in 8 weeks. My schedule was: Class from 7 AM till noon, work till 6, class (Genetics) from 6:30 till 9:30. Lather, rinse, repeat. It was entirely my own choice and I am not complaining and I am happy I did it, but good lord am I happy it is over.
Then it was august. August! I had a week off from class- I only had to work. And then guess where I was invited to go? Bartha's Pinyard, yet again! Talk about a mistake, Rich and Powerful People. You'd think after last time, it would be abundantly clear that when surrounded by money I become the love child of Chris Farley and Mary Katherine Gallagher. I'm louder than I mean to be, if something is expensive I will fall on it, and the one thing you are not supposed to say to a certain celebrity (SORRY ABOUT THAT TIME YOU WERE SUPER DRUNK ON TV DID YOU FORGET TO EAT OR SOMETHING I DO THAT ALL THE TIME HAHAHAHAHHA Good god I'm sorry!) I will say, without fail.
While I was on the Pinyard, what I would consider an A List Celebrity came to visit. Here is how I found out he was in town. He walked in on me in the shower. No joke. Here I am, trying to wash chicken poop off of my feet, and all of a sudden I'm in someone else's fantasy. NOT MINE. Someone else's. I can't tell you who it is but rest assured, if I were a Tween Girl or a gay man, I would have offered my thanks to the Jesus before dropping my towel. What I did instead was scream "OCUPADO!" and then I swore a lot.
The next day the celebrity saw me at the coffee shop and he tried to buy me a coffee to make up for his indiscretion, and I rejected him and said "I can buy my OWN coffee! And that wouldn't make up for ANYTHING ANYWAY."
Then he offered to buy me a breakfast sandwich too.
Now we're friends, because I'm a girl who can't resist a breakfast sandwich.
There were more celebrity shitshows, one of which culminated in a famous person forcing me to try a bite of a Kobe beef hot dog at a pool party.
I hate hot dogs.
But this was fucking amazing.
School has started again. I'm taking Organic Chem and Endocrine Physiology. Nothing is too terrible yet, but it is very early, so there is plenty of time for things to dissolve into a big sticky mess.
Other highlights:
I went to a commitment ceremony on Cape Cod. It was touching, beautiful, utterly romantic, and so full of love my cup ran way over and spilled on the floor mats of my car. It was a truly perfect ceremony. And despite the photo below, it wasn't my own.
I'm the one on the left. We are in total friendlove.
The next day we went whalewatching, and watch whales we did. Amazing. I think that our whalespotting success was in no small part due to my friend's brilliant whale calling abilities:
I also went to a wedding with Dr Poop. His college roommate tied the knot in Chicago. Here I am with Dr Poop who is anonymized for the internet. I still won't let him read the blog, by the by. So mum's the word if you meet us on the street.
I don't know why I'm doing MaryKateAshleyOlson lips. I think I was trying not to laugh. Apologies.
And uh-oh! My dress saw into the future. Look behind me and you will see a dowdier, more matronly version of my dress's self.
Have you ever seen a girl look so much like a frog? Probably not!
Don't worry, there's video from this wedding too. You see, the reception was at the Brookfield Zoo in Chicago. I had been to the Brookfield Zoo in college once, and what I remember the most was the Mold-A-Rama machine. I love me some mold a ramas. Dr Poop tried to tell me that all the machines would be turned off by the time we left the reception, but I had faith. I knew I could get a mold a rama if I wanted it badly enough.
We found one lone lit-up machine and Dr Poop fronted the two dollars so that I could have my waxy hot baby. I almost didn't post this because at the end I totally geek out and it's embarrassing, but I know my friends from Chicago like to see the Mold A Rama shout out, so here you go. You don't have to watch it, by any means.
So that was my summer. A lot of work, a lot of fun, and over very very quickly.
First of all: FIRST! I know, it's annoying when people do that.
Second, yay! You're back! Please don't go away again, even if it means flunking Endocrine Physiology.
Third, such a multimedia artiste you've become since the summer, what with your images AND video clips. We like this personal evolution.
Fourth, you're just so adorable.
Fifth, the celebrity in the shower must be Antonio Banderas because you yelled at him in Spanish. Am I right? What do I win?
Sixth, I hate when someone else shows up wearing my party dress. "The future," as depicted in the photo, is a scary place. Don't go there.
Seventh, Dr. Poop has a manly jaw and lower half. Of the face, I mean. I can't speak to the rest of him, but I bet you do. You know--"speak" to the rest of him.
Hi Meg, Glad you're back (and lookin' good)! Also, I noticed you have not one but two stats counters and I'm wondering how you can handle that because I spend way too much time obsessing over who's visitng my site as it is.
glad to hear you're back! I loved the shower story and that you can be bought for a breakfast sandwich. If that ever happens to me I'm holding out for a smoothie.
I bet that bite of Kobe beef hot dog cost about $30. I didn't go to the kobe beef place in Japan because it cost approximately $5million for a few ounces of beef cooked on a hot stone. Why would they turn that into a hot dog anyway?
Ohmygoodness, this was the highlight of my week! The freakin' *HIGHLIGHT* (Full disclosure, I don't get out much, so I'm not sure that has the same weight as when other people say it)!
You look lovely in your pretty not-future dress and Dr. Poop is very tall. You look cute together. You sound super busy, so thanks for updating. I was beginning to wonder if you were going to go away (like Garrett did...yes, I'm still a tidge bitter that he disappeared the week after I added him to my Google Reader) forever. I'm glad you didn't.
PS: The word verification is "bratt" - It's my favorite word verification EVAH!
dgm- you and your response in list form are just the best things. It wasn't antonio banderas, but that's a good guess. think younger and slightly more angsty. and I'll tell dr poop that you think he looks manly. he'll love that, because i mostly think he looks like he was on the C team in middle school basketball.
hi skepptic! In answer to your question, it's very easy to handle two stat counters because I dont look at either one. I mostly forget they're there, and I think I put one in on accident and my friend put in the other. So that's how.
pdw-thanks!
lora- I've been reading you this whole time, but I too am too lazy to email.
IW- xoxo
rosie- oh, i know. I have no concept of how expensive a kobe beef hot dog would be anyway. but i'm telling you, it was pretty tasty. tasty and the earmark of crazy people.
Oh lainey, lainey, you are so sweet. I didn't go away, I was just so swamped and then busy being naked in front of celebrities on accident. hopefully I'll find a regular posting schedule again.
girl- i certainly won't. and i meant to comment recently that I too have the jewelry taste of a gypsy and I got it from my grandmother. My mother wears no jewelry at all. My grandma and I gravitate toward the shiny like moths to a flame. nice post, that was.
What the hell? I'm genuinely pissed off. I want a Mod-A-Rama and I want it now. I travel, a fair amount, and I have NEVER seen one of these nor heard of them. WTF.
Name:A Lover and a Fighter Home:New York, NY About Me:"It is a very sad thing that nowadays there is so little useless information."
-Oscar Wilde See my profile...
First of all: FIRST!
I know, it's annoying when people do that.
Second, yay! You're back! Please don't go away again, even if it means flunking Endocrine Physiology.
Third, such a multimedia artiste you've become since the summer, what with your images AND video clips. We like this personal evolution.
Fourth, you're just so adorable.
Fifth, the celebrity in the shower must be Antonio Banderas because you yelled at him in Spanish. Am I right? What do I win?
Sixth, I hate when someone else shows up wearing my party dress. "The future," as depicted in the photo, is a scary place. Don't go there.
Seventh, Dr. Poop has a manly jaw and lower half. Of the face, I mean. I can't speak to the rest of him, but I bet you do. You know--"speak" to the rest of him.
Oh sorry bye!