THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU. Someone else who was socialized by Laura Ingalls Wilder. When I first transferred to public school after my uniformed Catholic school childhood, I thought that a calico dress with granny boots would be the coolest possible outfit for my first day.

You can pretty much guess what my life was like for the next few years.

Anyway... love your blog. It makes my own escapades seem less awkward by comparison.

 

Oh Meg, I love you so. :)

 

I too was a Little House on the Prairie devotee. I had more than one dress inspired by Laura Ingalls. However, I can't remember anyone chewing on pens in a flirtatious way.

I'm so glad you share your stories.

 

Ah, so that's why my co-workers always seem so uncomfortable around me. I didn't know about the "not showing your cooter" workplace rule. There really should be some sort of manual about this stuff.

 

Every now and then you queue for a public toilet and when a cubicle finally opens you've managed to get the only one without a lock.
Some people sit and put a foot against the door to prevent it opening, but when you're barely over 5 feet tall, your legs simply don't reach that far, so do you sit and lean forward, fingertips barely reaching the door either?
Do you pretend to go, flush, leave and just wait for another opportunity?
There is a school of thought that suggests putting your bag by the door so it can be seen from the outside, making it clear it's occupied, but really, what's on the floor of a public toilet?
There needs to be a book on toilet etiquette.

 

Flibbertigibbet - I hang my bag over the door and attempt to hold trhe door shut with my fingertips (even though lord only knows what's on that door) - and at 5'8, it isn't easy either. Some people choose to talk loudly "I AM IN HERE THE LOCK IS BROKEN DO NOT OPEN" but you know, that isn't my style...

Meg, I just watched Choke literally last night and discovered that leaving the toilet door unlocked is an invitation to people who come in for sex. I mean they were on an airplane but I'm pretty certain the same principle applies although it seems like trying to pick up in NICU would be in really, really poor taste. But you never know.

 

I find boxes of hair SO friggin' sexy - glad you do, too!

~ Piney (the guy who pines for Meg even though she's way too smart and pretty for his dull old ass. Anyway, she's utterly charming and I'm wicked jealous of the lucky bastard who finally settles her hash and sires her spawn).

Word verification of the day: sange.
Noun. It's a salad ingredient in posh eateries but also, weirdly, in dirt poor Belgian villages where the populace doesn't know that what they're eating is worth a lot of money. Like all those terribly poor truffles farmers living in poverty in the south of France.

 

(Psst, Piney! Meg's going to adopt. See 25 things, couple posts back.)
As someone who had perpetual bruises throughout gradeschool, I feel a sort of kinship. They stopped along with my ability to respond to people while in motion, because my thoughts would be along the lines of, "DON'T bump into door jam. Okay, Okaaay. DON'T slam into desk. Good one. Ok. PILEOFBOOKSPILEOFBOOKSAAAAGH! ... Damn."
MJ - sign me up for that manual!

 

Mmmmm....box of hair....
ROWR!

 

Hey, don't sell yourself short. I've seen some pretty sexy boxes of hair. ; )

-CapriceClassic

 

If Mary Ingalls chewed on the wrong end of a pen, it was because she was blind. Still, verrrrrry seXXXy!

 

My response to every bullet point? Of course you did...

 

I too have failed at flirting when involving a pen. It seems like it would be a handy tool for nibbling or twirling my hair around, or dropping on the floor and bending over seductively to pick it up.

But in my case, I was trying to make small talk and referenced it as my favorite pen and then made something like a guffaw noise.

Oh I feel ill just thinking about it.