Hobocamp

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Today I confessed to my co-worker that I have a GINORMOUS crush on one of the doctors on our floor.

"Which one?" she asked. I pointed him out on the department photo and sighed dreamily. "Do you know anything about him?" I asked. She's worked there quite a bit longer than I have, and she knows all the dirt.

"Hmmm...him..." she murmured.

"What do you know? Tell me everything."

"Well, I'm having trouble remembering...I feel like I heard a story about him a year or two ago..."

I swiveled my chair and scooted towards her. "You have GOT to tell me. He's so shy! It took him forever to even ask my name, even though we make doofy smiles at each other all the time."

"Yeah...I think I heard a story about him from Ryan..."

"And then now, we say hi and we chat, and there is just PALPABLE sexual tension!"

"What WAS it...something...something about...something, at his apartment, maybe...gah, I just can't remember..."

"He's just the gentlest, nicest guy, or he SEEMS like it. I bet he's so sweet."

"Oh! Okay. I think I got it. I can't remember, exactly, but he's either the guy who got arrested last year for punching his wife OR he's that really cute one who volunteers at the kiddie cancer camp."

"Oh- oh."

"I'm pretty sure he's one of those. I'm not sure which...so HEY!" she said, giddy for me, "maybe you guys will go out soon!"

So obviously, I'm really excited to maybe go out with either a married abuser OR a pediatrician with a heart of gold.

What will he be?

Will he be a dream? Ooooooooooooh! Or will he be a dud? Sigh!

Labels: fake relationships

posted by A Lover and a Fighter at 4:58 PM -

7 Comments:

At 7:09 PM, Fraulein N said…

I can understand her confusion. Married abuser, sweet pediatrician ... I get those mixed up all the time. Oh, it's so exciting!
At 8:17 PM, d. said…

I am positively petulant. You're going to tell me his name tomorrow, right? Maybe I know something...hmm...
At 8:14 AM, jamelah said…

Either way, I bet you'll end up with a great story.
At 10:14 AM, TK said…

Er... not to fuck up a perfectly good story, but... you don't actually have a date, right?

As in, this mystery date is currently only in your head? Well, if that's the case, take your pick. Hell, he could be a contract killer, or a vascular surgeon who drinks on the job, or a cocaine mule for the Medellin Cartel. It's like a choose your own adventure book!
At 10:41 AM, Doug - Rachel's dad said…

Couldn't this dude be both felon and gallant? And is that a bad thing? As Freud would say, "Holy crap." Except he'd say it in a thick German accent (not unlike Werner Klemperer a.k.a. Colonel Klink warning Colonel Hogan).
At 11:01 AM, A Lover and a Fighter said…

Fraulein- I know, I should be more understanding. Not everyone shares my stickler-for-details-n-domestics trait.

D- Yes! I'm coming to tell you right now!

Jamelah- I will only have a great story if the bugger asks me out. Mostly our conversations now consist of him hovering at my door and mumbling, and me screaming nervously about my broken iPod. It's a match made in socially retarded heaven.

tk- oh, no, you read it right. no actual date YET. that's why i said MAYBE go out. It could happen! I'm a goal-oriented girl!

DRD-Yeah, it's a tough call. I could probably overlook his record if he had been arrested for, say, protesting...or weed...or even unpaid parking tickets, though that's obnoxious- just pay them. What, rules don't apply to you? But if he was really arrested for punching his wife, i'm going to go ahead and steer clear of that relationship.
At 12:13 PM, Rev said…

Here in America, you're innocent until proven guilty. Give him a chance, who knows? It might have been self-defense.

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