Hobocamp

Monday, October 02, 2006

Reason number 615 why I'm convinced my life is being taped for a TV show

The love of my work life walked in on my while I was in the potty.

Sort of.

I am working late right now. Working late at my job means that for the bulk of the evening you are alone on the 10th floor, occasionally visited by Clarence, the overly-prying-but-not-at-all-unpleasant janitor who thinks your name is Marge. This is always a welcome interruption, as he has many a whimsical tale that starts "My wife, she real big. I mean, beautiful, but REAL big. I say to her 'Woman, how you get so big? You better get it under control!' because she ain't that old. Too bad about her teeth, though," and so on. Later he asks why your fiance doesn't come wait with you while you're at work. He has long ago stopped believing that you don't have one, so you are forced to tell him that your fiance works nights as the security guard at the horse barn in Central Park. Then you try to change the subject. But I digress.

So, I was in the bathroom just now, having finished my bathroomly duties, and as I reached up to unlock the door, I kind of hooked myself in the hair with my watch. It made a big unpleasant hair situation. Door now unlocked, I turned toward the mirror to fix my luxurious mane. I decided that it was hopeless and as I turned and tugged on the doorknob, it WHOOSHED open because it was being pushed by Lab Lover.

Lab Lover is adorable. He's just as cute as a button. A hairy, Australian, Euro-pants-wearing, nerdy little button. He makes my heart go pitter-pat!

So he opened the door and there I was, mouth hanging open in shock, hair all akimbo. He immediately started blushing horribly which I was somehow able to see despite noticing my own intense blushing. What followed was a really embarrassed, rather shrieky conversation:

Him: Ahh! Oh my god! I'm SO sorry!
Me: Ahhh! I'm sorry! I wasn't...I didn't!
Him: It's a good thing I work in a hospital!
Me: (Still kind of screaming) Oh, yeah??
Him: Right. Because, well, I think I need one now.
Me: (laughs too hard)
Him: I'm really sorry. I should knock. I should learn to be a knocker! This is why people knock.

At this point, it occurs to me that maybe I can leave the bathroom now. I step away from the door.

Him: Oh no, by all means, I can use the other one. I'm so sorry. Take all the time you need. I mean. Um.
Me: NO! Here. Use this one. I have been done for a long time. I was totally just hanging out. (Oh jesus) I mean. Not like hanging out in here. But I was pulling on the door as you opened it because I was leaving- it made me feel really strong. The door opened so easily.
Him: I had pushed it. Next time I'll knock.
Me: Oh, pshaw.

PSHAW??????

Me: Well, I have to go.
Him: Oh, sure. I'll see you later.
Me: We're both still blushing really a lot.
Him: Ha. Okay!

Aaaaand scene.

posted by A Lover and a Fighter at 6:43 PM -

3 Comments:

At 12:40 PM, Anonymous said…

holy bejeebus, that made me feel all awkward just reading it!
At 10:23 AM, Maxine Dangerous said…

*snort* You said "pshaw." :] The first part of your conversation sounded like a scene from "Grey's Anatomy." Very Meredith-y and angsty in that kicky flippy fun way. ;]
At 6:58 PM, Jaelithe said…

"Oh, pshaw," as in, "Don't be silly-- I enjoy it when you walk in on me while in the bathroom! It brightens my whole day! Or, er, night."